We didn’t go trick or treating last night. We had two punk bands playing in the shop so we got our black gear on and went to watch. They screamed a bit, but they were good.
One of the bass players, an imposing 6 foot 5 hunk of punk rock muscle turned out to be very funny. He looked like someone you’d never want to meet in a dark alley but he had a well-stocked arsenal of corny jokes.
Here are his best corny vampire jokes.
What’s it like to be kissed by a vampire?
It’s a pain in the neck.
What type of dog does Dracula have?
A blood hound.
Why are vampire families so close?
Because blood is thicker than water.
What is Dracula’s favourite flavour of ice cream?
Vein-illa.
Just goes to show that punk rockers can be silly too.
Hope you had a fun Hallowe’en!
Oh… a bit corny ,yes, but funny indeed ! I will be forwarding these to a friend who is in need of of good laugh. Thanks Selma. I hope you had fun at the gig, and perhaps got to kick up your high Halloween heels !
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Hi PUNATIK,
Sometimes the corniest jokes are the funniest ones, aren’t they? Glad I could give you a laugh!
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Oh, boy! My daughter is going to love these!
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How cool you are going to see punk rockers. Don’t remember the last time I did that!
You are one of the few people I “know” who spells Hallowe’en with the apostrophe. I stopped doing it this year because I felt like I was the only person in the world who did so. But I shall revert to it again now I see that I have company.
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I too spell Hallowe’en with the apostrophe! And my kids loved the jokes.
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You gotta love a funny punk. …the irony of it all. Wish I had been there!
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MAMA ZEN:
My son loved them. Who knew Dracula liked ice cream? π
RELUCS:
I’ve always used the apostrophe, I think. I also think it looks spookier with the apostrophe plunked between the two ‘e’s like that. Quite Gothic!
KATE:
Yay for apostrophe lovers! So glad your kids liked the jokes π
STEPH:
You’re back β Oh that is just fantastic. It has made my day to hear from you. It is ironic, isn’t it? However, many of the punks I’ve met have had a great sense of humour. Often it’s just their look that is confronting, not their personality. So glad to see you XXXX
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haha, Vein-nilla! Humor keeps me sane, (or insane as it were) Happy Belated Halloween, Selma!
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At the risk of sounding too schoolmasterly, it should, in fact, be two words … Hallow E’en … (the apostrophe denoting that a V has been omitted) It’s a Scots expression, meaning the night before All Hallows (Saints) Day, when all sorts of spooky things are supposed to happen.
But, nothing to do with Hallowe’en … did you go to, or know about this? http://www.travel-wonders.com/2009/10/breakfast-sydney-harbour-bridge-grass.html
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I had a book of PJs when I was in my teens. For Halloween I remember this stupid one:
What does a baby zombie call his parents?
Mummy and Deady!
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Oh how fun! I LOVE corny jokes! Here’s some more:
What kind of alley does a ghost prefer to haunt?
A dead end.
Why wasn’t the vampire working?
He was on his coffin break.
What’s a ghosts favourite ride at the carnival?
The roller ghoster
What musical instrument does a skeleton play?
A trombone
π
Oh, and I hold the belief that rockers are just ordinary people that have successfully camouflaged themselves. π
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GEL:
I love the vein-illa joke. For some reason it has really tickled me π
TRAVELRAT:
You are right. Next year I must remember to spell it correctly.
I wanted to have brekkie on the Harbour Bridge but I was working that day. They say they might do it again next year, so if they do I’ll definitely go. Sounds like fun!
ROSHAN:
I love that one. π
TEX:
Agree with you completely about the rockers.
The jokes are brilliant. π π π
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I love corny jokes.
How many witches does it take to change a light bulb?
Just one, but she changes it into a toad.
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EMPLOYEE 3699:
Spooktacular π
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The more I read it, the more it impresses me. I donβt know how I ever worked without hilarious and funny things in our life, Life would be so much easier especially when there’s a jokes here and there. Being funny is nice because a lot of serious people are lacking with this kind of behavior that is why they are much look older. I would like to thank you for your outstanding blog post. Keep it up! Awesome!
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Hi HILARIOUS JOKER,
You’ve got to have a laugh. It’s as simple as that. It makes life worth living. Thanks for stopping by π
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