Internal Dialogue

I have a voice in my head. It’s not a hearing voices type of voice, it actually is my own voice, just the part that lives in my head.

Some people would call that voice my conscience, others would call it a manifestation of the ego; to me, it is more like the better part of me, the part that always believes in hope and second chances and holding on for one more day.

I don’t mean to sound melodramatic by saying this but without that voice I wouldn’t be here. I know that for a fact. I would have given up long ago.

There is so much horror in life. So many obstacles to overcome. So many moments where we feel coping is not an option. The panic and self-doubt begins to set in. We are overwhelmed by illness that affects us physically and mentally. The darkness closes in like a net.

We look at the world and know there are so many things that are unfair, that are unjust, that we are ruining by our greed and self-obsession.

It is easy to throw in the towel.

But the voice is persistent. It nags, slightly.

You will regret it if you don’t face this, it says.

You cannot run away from yourself. This path is meant for you. You would not be made to walk this path if you were incapable of reaching the end of it.

Call it Gut instinct

Self belief

There are many terms that apply.

I think we should celebrate that voice in our heads a little more. The internal dialogue that holds our hands on the longest nights.

Trust it

Believe in it

Above all, embrace it.

That voice is an angel whispering in your ear.

27 thoughts on “Internal Dialogue

  1. I know what you are talking about.
    To me, it’s our inner consciousness, sort of a half sleeping side of our personality. It is something that you are only just aware of, that inner voice that whispers in your ear. We don’t hear it all the time, because our lives are a veritable cacophony of visual and auditory stimulation.
    However, there are those times where things are difficult, when time is running out, when you have to make a decision, where something big is about to happen (or is already happening). During those times, we seem to have the innate ability to filter out everything else, until we hear that inner voice. It usually tells us what we already know, but are not ready to accept.
    Some call it having an epiphany – I know that I’ve had a couple in my life that hit me with all the delicacy of a runaway freight train coming down a mountain with the wind behind it.
    Anyway, I like how you put it. It makes me realize that there is a lot in life that we don’t really talk about – and that maybe we should. At least that’s how I see it! Take care Selma!

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  2. Great post Selma and I agree. That’s why I believe in dream analysis – there’s a whole part of ourselves that we need to get to know better and it’s trying to communicate with us every night, if only we’d let it. But it is all part of that thing we call the self – not an external force or being, simply the me or I.

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  3. Hi MANOJ:
    What an incredibly astute analysis. You said it much better than I ever could. ‘It usually tells us what we already know’ – that’s it, exactly. Thank you for your wonderful insight!

    Hi GABRIELLE:
    I don’t know much about dream analysis. I have a lot of trouble remembering my dreams. I think it’s because I sleep very badly in sort of fragmented bursts. I think it’s really interesting that there is a part of ourselves we might learn about through dreams. I’m going to read up on it. Cheers!

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  4. I live and die but gut instinct. Unfortunately, I tend to get really sick to my stomach when something feels oogy. So you know, I listen to it.

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  5. Oh yes, I love my inner voice. I’d never complete my runs without him nagging at me: “come on, just to the next lamp post, don’t stop now.” He quite often gets very cross with me and I can almost see him stamping his feet as I dither over something.

    I do have a nasty habit of actually speaking to myself though – I quite often chastise myself out loud and also say things like “well done, that wasn’t so bad, was it?”. My sons are used to it but I do try to make an effort not to do it in public.

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  6. It is so important to listen to our internal voice. What we need to be careful of is the negative voice that many people have developed which drags them down and throws up limitations. The key is to discern between the two or more voices in our head.

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  7. “The internal dialogue that holds our hands on the longest nights” – that is a beautiful thought, Selma. It tells me none of us are really alone, we all have access to something greater and it can be found within ourselves. I also think what Gabrielle said was interesting about dreams – I have found my dreams to be a guide, even though I do not always understand them, but I do remember specifically a time in my life where I chose to listen to my dreams and it really helped me deal with a situation I was a bit shaky about. And, spookily, a few years later I met a man that I had previously met in a dream, at least 12 months prior to meeting him in person. I knew it was from the dream because we walked past a fence one night that I’d also seen in the dream. He wore similar clothing, same colour hair, height, etc. It was a few months after meeting him that I remembered the dream.

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  8. Hi Selma,

    I have and hear that voice. But prior to that voice comes a feeling in my body, in my bones, my skin, my gut. The voice tends to be verification of the feeling.

    A thought-provoking post.

    Thanks,
    DavidM

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  9. Hi HILLY:
    I’m the same. Stress or worry or fear hits me in the stomach straight away. It sorts out the good stuff from the bad. I think it’s so important to listen to that gut instinct!

    Hi RELUCS:
    You do have to be careful of answering yourself back. I do that too. I am thinking of permanently wearing one of those earpieces so that people think I’m talking on a mobile, not to myself. 😆

    Hi MELEAH:
    I have learned to trust that voice. It just seems to know the right thing to do.

    Hi TOBEME:
    Oh, absolutely. The positive headspeak has to override the negative because it can become easy to focus on the cannots instead of the cans. Such an excellent point.

    Hi ROWE:
    It sounds like you could have a bit of a second sight thing going on in your dreams. That is a fascinating story about the man you dreamt about 12 months before you met him. Did you recognise him straight away or did it come to you gradually that you had dreamed about him? Dreams are an incredibly interesting subject.

    Hi DAVID:
    Isn’t it interesting how there seems to be a connection between the voice and some kind of physical stimulus? It’s almost like a psychic experience. WOW.

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  10. Selma – I know what you are talking about! I have one of those voices too and I can also say if it wasn’t for that voice I don’t know where I would be!

    On another note a have so much to tell you but no time 😦 But I am going to send you a quick e-mail ( I have a new account on gmail – so check your junk just in case, someone hacked in to my other account!) I miss our little email chats!

    Hope you are well!

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  11. That inner voice has savaed my life a couple of times, saying things like:

    ‘Don’t panic! You can deal with this; remember what you’ve been taught … just think things through!’ etc.

    Did you ever hear the story (Stendhal, I think) of the man walking by the river when he saw a man in difficulties in the water. He thought of all sorts of excuses not to go in after him; it was the middle of winter; he had a cold coming on; he didn’t swim very well etc. Then, the little voice inside said:
    ‘Vous êtes un lâche!’ (You are a coward)

    That one word stung him into action; he dived in, and pulled the man to safety.

    And, the word? Not ‘lâche’ but ‘vous’; he was concerned that his conscience had ceased to address him with the familar ‘tu’!

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  12. It’s so important to listen to that “still small voice inside” but sometimes its so easy to forget. At our peril!!!

    I’ve NEVER known my gut instinct to be wrong. But I have ignored that voice at times and have been sorry later, that I did.

    🙂 Great post Sel and a good reminder. Hugs, G

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  13. The angel that is the “real” you. I too salute my inner voice for molding, protecting, reassuring, and encouraging me my entire life. Hear, hear to the inner voice celebration!! 🙂

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  14. Ah, Selma. Sadly, I am of two voices sometimes. There is a voice that increases its chatter at certain times in my life. It’s the voice of doom and gloom; it berates me, calls me an all around failure, a bad mother, a bad person. This is the same voice that whispers to me about all sorts of catastrophes looming on the horizon. Disease, disaster, destitution. The voice that tells me I will fall through the cracks, that I will never be good enough, that my time is past and I have wasted my life. The voice tells me I am not worthy of love and I will die alone and forgotten.

    You can imagine how frightening it is to have that endless litany in your head. Fortunately, its reach goes not beyond a certain point. There are boundaries. No matter how bad things get, how loud the self loathing gets, at the core there is a voice of love that soars above the negativity and gets me through. Love for my family, love for myself, a fierce love of life. It is exhausting, however.

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  15. I call this inner voice my intuition. It took time for me to learn how to listen to it and trust it. Every time I’ve ignored it I’ve ended up in a tough situation. It has little to do with reason. Reasoning might be wrong because it is often nothing but rationalization. This voice of mine has never been never wrong.

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  16. Hi TBALL:
    That voice has kept me going for many years. I thank the powers that be for it because without it I would be lost.

    Hi TRAVELRAT:
    I had heard the story but not the point you make of his conscience no longer addressing him with the familiar form of ‘you’. That conscience didn’t hold back. I think it highlights the fact that part of us does disapprove when we don’t do the right thing. I know if I walk past someone in need it can prey on my mind for days. So now I always have to try and do something. Damned inner voice!

    Hi PUNATIK:
    Well, thank God for your inner voice. The world would be less bright without you, that is for sure!

    Hi GERALDINE:
    I’ve ignored it too and it has definitely been to my detriment. I try to listen to it as much as possible these days. It is much wiser than me!

    Hi STEPH:
    I love how you say ‘encouraging you your entire life’ – that is beautiful. I will certainly join you in that celebration !!!

    Hi INGRID:
    Hon, I battle that niggling voice too. I think it goes hand in hand with depression and stress. It whispers at my shoulder’ Give up give up’ but the sensible voice (which can often be very deeply buried) usually intervenes at the 11th hour. I know exactly what you mean – it IS exhausting!

    Hi SHIONA:
    Isn’t it interesting how so many of us have discovered that if we listen to our inner voice we make the right decision? You have hit on such a important point and that is that we have to learn to listen to and trust our intuition. Once we do the sky is the limit!

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  17. It is what guards against self doubt. It saves us from indecision. It wakes us from a stupor. It challenges us when we’re comfortable.

    The little inner voice. Gotta love it! 🙂

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  18. HI SLAMDUNK:
    Oh, definitely. You cannot ignore that inner voice in any way. It’s probably a good thing!

    Hi TEX:
    You put it so well. You really and truly have to love it!

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  19. That voice is keeping me going right now. It’s the one that believes deep down that good triumphs over evil… this is just a set back… a minor set back.

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  20. Hi NAT:
    Good does triumph over evil but sometimes that victory is a long time coming. It is just a set back. Things will work out in the end XX

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  21. It never fails that I read your words & I think to myself, this is exactly
    what I needed to hear. Ah, the voice that keeps us moving along ~ like Ingrid,
    it is the other voice that often speaks loudly & I fall into a heap of
    despair (made so much worse by huge banks of snow and -23c weather).
    Remembering that the survival voice is there helps.

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  22. Oh yes…that little inner voice. My guardian angel who keeps me on the right path and acts as my conscience when I am tempted to throw caution to the wind. I was never sure whether my inner voice could be trusted in the past but I have no such doubts any more.

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  23. Hi KATE:
    I can’t blame the despairing voice for rearing its ugly head when it’s -23C. You have had such a bitter winter. I would be a wreck. But the little survival voice always rises up again. I am so glad I could help you in some way. That is awesome!

    Hi GYPSY:
    I used to doubt it, but like you I don’t anymore. That voice has proven itself to me time and time again. It is such a relief to know it’s there!

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